SrI: SrImathE SatakOpAya nama: SrImathE rAmAnujAya nama: SrImath varavaramunayE nama:
Q and A Video responses
Q and A Text responses
Q. How long does birth theettu last when child is born in paternal relation?
Depends on the relationship. If it is within 7 generations and child is a boy, it will be 10 days. Otherwise, it will probably be 3 days. Also, ASoucham applies irrespective of where the relationship (family member) lives (that is within the same household or separately in different place).
Q. Is suthak for girl child’s and male child’s birth same?
For the parents and paternal grandparents – it is the same whether boy or girl child is born. But for others, less days of ASoucham for girl child.
Q. How to celebrate SrI jayanthi if someone had death on janmAsthami thithi?
Depends on how close that relative is – if it is a relative whose death will bring us ASoucham, then no SrI jayanthi celebration by us.
Q. How many days ASoucham for women if their uncle’s son dies?
1.5 days
Q. Will brahmachAri have ASoucham if he is in gurukuam or when he is living in a house or with parents?
brahmachAri will have no ASoucham in general. But the karthA (performer of the rites), even if brahmachAri, will have ASoucham. Also, when the brahmachAri is living with others who have ASoucham and mix with them, then he will also have the same effect. If brahmachAris stay in the same place as those who have ASoucham and mix with them – then they don’t have purity to engage in any kainkaryams. If they don’t mix with ASoucham people at all, then they can take part in kainkaryams, and other usual routine.
Q. During ASoucham if there is no gOmUthra available, instead on the 10th day can we drink AchArya SrIpAdha thIrtham?
Yes.
Q. If my elder brother had a girl child born, what are the rules of ASoucham that need to be observed and for how many days?
Usually, 10 days of ASoucham for very close relatives. thiruvArAdhanam cannot be done – perumAL needs to be placed in someone else’s place (you can try to find some SrIvaishNavAs or any temple in your neighbourhood, who may accommodate).
During ASoucham we can re-use a minimum set of clothes, utensils etc since whatever we use during this period needs to be purified fully, after the 10 days period is over. Purification can be done by washing the washable items and then either doing proper puNyAhavachanam or sprinkling water mixed with turmeric/cow dung.
For a girl child, still ASoucham will be there for the first level of connection. After 1st level, for a girl child, heard that there is no ASoucham – just taking a bath as soon as hearing the news is sufficient.
Q. Why does ASoucham come whenever there is birth or death?
It is explained in that manner in SAsthram. Hence, we accept it. Mainly it revolves around blood relatives who have some connection with each other. During birth and death in such close families, naturally one will be emotionally impacted, and one may need to help the affected persons/families. This may be the reason why those who are related are stopped from engaging in other activities and are forced to focus on the situation at hand.
Q. Is there a reason why ASoucham is for 10 days?
It is not just 10 days – it varies depending on the level of the relationship. It also depends on one’s varNa. Different varNas have different days of ASoucham for different occasions.
Q. What is the jAtha ASoucham period for brahmanas?
Depends on how close the relative is. Usually for very close relatives, for 7 generations connection, it is 10 days beyond that, it is 3 days.
Q. What does the term dhasa rAthra nyathi and thri rAthra nyathi mean?
dhasa rAthra nyAthi are those who are paternally connected with us in 7 generations, and we have 10 days ASoucham when birth or death happens in such families. thri rAthra nyathi means 3 days, in the same way.
Q. If we are unable to observe thirunakshathram of Acharyas/AzhwArs/perumAL due to factors like ASoucham or unavoidable travel, when can it be observed?
Same nakshathram in the subsequent month, can be celebrated at home in a grand manner.
Q. When a new baby is born, what are the rituals and procedures to be followed as a SrIvaishNava? Is it true we cannot do pUja or go to temple? Can others (other than mother) touch the baby? During naming ceremony can others touch the baby?
Yes – depending on the relationship with the baby, the parents, grandparents and paternal relatives will have 10 days ASoucham for 7 generations. During this time, we cannot do pUjA, go to temple and mingle with others. Once the ASoucham is over, we need to purify the place and then resume regular routine. The mother of the baby will usually have ASoucham for 48 days or so.
Usually during this time, baby will be taken care by mother only. Someone will obviously be assisting the mother. Occasionally others can take the baby, clothes should be removed from baby and the baby can be given to others without coming in to contact with the mother. The purpose of this period is to avoid external contact for both baby and mother, since infections could easily affect both of them.
Naming ceremony day, that 1 day is exception. Purification is done on that one day and it is valid only for that day for the mother.
Q. How many days of theettu if aththai (aunt) dies?
3 days theettu.
Q. In thirumalA, on special days dharSan takes around 24 hours, if we sleep in compartment for some time, do we become impure? In such case is taking dharSan of perumAL is fine?
Inside the temple, usually theettu, vizhuppu etc don’t affect. It is usually said that for inside the dhvaja sthambam. In SrIrangam, saptha prAkAram used to be like that – but nowadays many impurities have come. In thirumalA, since the whole mountain is AdhiSEsha or bhagavAn’s form, no such defects are there.
Q. During theettu/aSoucham, can pUrvAchArya sthOthrams or dhivyaprabandham be recited?
No – we cannot recite any prabandhams, sthOthrams etc. during theettu. They can be meditated upon and recited in mind.
Q. Is there any reference for not wearing SrIchUrnam during ASoucham?
Our elders’ anushtAnams are important reference for us. It should be there in dharma SAsthram.
Q. For a woman- if we have ASoucham from the passing away of father in law’s elder brother – and the dates of ASoucham is overlapping with mother’s first year SrAdhdha and Subham, can we attend mother’s ceremonies?
Cannot attend mother’s ceremony due to this ASoucham from husband side.
Q. What to do if, after setting dolls for navarAthri ASoucham happened?
Let it be there. No need to do anything. After ASoucham, put it back.
Q. How many time gAyathrI japam during sandhyAvandhanam can be done for birth ASoucham?
If ASoucham – recite a reduced number of gAyathrI manthram (28) during sandhyAvandhanam.
Q. Can we recite pAsurams or listen to kAlakshEpams during vruddhi (birth) theettu and kshaya (death) theettu (ASoucham)?
Reciting pAsurams aloud is not generally practiced. They can be recited in the mind to oneself. The same holds true with regard to kAlakshEpams, because during olden days, people attended kAlakshEpams in person. So, when a person with ASoucham attends kAlakshEpams, it causes disturbances to others. But these days, due to use if technology, during vruddhi theettu, we can listen to kAlakshEpams without touching the granthams. During times of kshaya theettu, that also should be avoided.
Q. During the period of ASoucham (ritul impurity), can the karthA or other family members in the state of impurity perform sandhyAvandhanam and thiruvArAdhanam (after 3 or 1.5 days)? Currently, as ceremonies are often conducted in common places in cities, is it permissible to partake in AhAram provided there?
sandhyAvandhanam must be performed even during the period of ritual impurity. Once the period of impurity ends, thiruvArAdhanam can be performed. The karthA may perform the rites starting from the evening of the 12th day, after completing the sapiNdi karaNam, if necessary. Until the time of Subha sveekAram, if there are others available who can perform the rituals, they may be asked to do so.
Regarding AhAra niyamam, they may vary from person to person. Depending on one’s specific circumstances, partaking in meals at public venues may be permissible. Generally, the following types of food are not recommended:
i) vilaichchORu (food bought with money, such as from restaurants),
ii) maNachchORu (food served at materialistic auspicious events like marriage),
iii) piNachchORu (food served at inauspicious events).
However, if the food is prepared in temples, religious institutions, or the homes of SrIvaishNavas, and if there is a proper relationship, such food may be accepted.
Q. If manni (anna’s wife) attaining AchAryan thiruvadi, what are the rules for ASoucham?
thirumaN alone is to be adorned.
No thiruvArAdhanam at home till 11th day. If possible, arrange some SrIvaishNava to take perumAL to their place and do thiruvArAdhanam.
No koyil kainkaryam as well.
Can recite guru paramparA, dhvayam, grantham mUlam sthOthrams in mind at home.
kshavaram on 10th day. After Anandha hOmam, thirumaN/SrIchUrNam, both can be applied. yagyOpavItham should be changed on 11th day.
For festivals at home– this depends on situation. For perumAL uthsavams like SrIjayanthi and AzhwAr/AchAryar thirunakshathrams, we can do the uthsavam as best as possible, without our personal pampering like new clothes etc. Other festivals like varusha paruppu and Adi pandigai need not be celebrated.
Q. During ASoucham, what can be done if there are no SrIvaishNavAs available who can take perumAL for ArAdhanam?
In case of ASoucham – if we have no other choice, then keeping the perumAL closed is the only option. We need to seek forgiveness for being unable to arrange something for perumAL.
Q. Even though for a brAhmaNa 10 days we must be ASoucham, will it take 2 more days until we can perform vaidhika karmas due to last rites?
Last rites itself is a vaidhika karma, so it is not about vaidhika karma performance. But for the karthA and close relatives, they need to wait to go to temple and mix with general public until SubasvIkAram happens.
Q. Can we perform sandhyAvandhanam during ASoucham? Does this apply to all Asramas?
snAnam, Urdhva puNdram (thirumaN only) and sandhyAvandhanam should be done even during ASoucham. Yes. For brahmachAri and sanyAsi, there is no ASoucham at all, anyway.
Q. During monthly ASoucham, women should not consume perumAL prasAdham or thIrtham. But on the other hand, we are not to consume anything that is not offered to perumAL. So, what is the right practice to follow?
We can consume perumAL prasAdham – because we should sustain ourselves with perumAL prasAdham only. But perumAL thIrtham and SrIpAdha thIrtham, should not be consumed.
Q. How to perform puNyAhavachanam after 1 day, 3 days and 10 days theetu?
We can get puNyAhavachanam done from someone else’s place and do prOkshaNam on all objects which were touched. Also, all clothes and utensils which were touched need to be fully washed. Utensils can be washed with water mixed with cow dung.
Q. There are mixed instructions on thirumala darSanam during theettu (suthak) period. During such times of grief and loss, when we really long to go to temple its being told that it would become an apachAram. Please clarify why it is so.
For the karthA (the one who is doing the final rites), restrictions such as not going to hill temple, not going near seashore, etc., are applicable. The reason is – there were certain risks in the past in such places and anything happening to karthA will lead to abrupt stopping of the one-year rituals, which need to be completed, ideally. But there will be no such restrictions for others in the family.
Also, if one performs kainkaryam in a hill-temple, one will have to continue his kainkaryam after the 13th day. Such restrictions will not apply to such person.
Some of these get exaggerated without understanding the real purpose. The hypocrisy will be visible when they will avoid going to temple, but go everywhere else. But as per SAsthram, one should remain at home throughout the period.
Q. What should we do regarding thiruvArAdhanam in suthak (theettu) when someone dies?
We need to arrange someone else to take deities to their home or they should come and do the worship here.
Q. Can we do thiruvArAdhanam during birth theettu?
As long as there is ASoucham, one cannot do naivEdhyam. A SrIvaishNava who is not having ASoucham can do thiruvArAdhanam and naivEdhyam for perumAL.
Q. If an unmarried girl’s father’s sister attains thiruvadigal, does the unmarried girl observe theettu?
For unmarried girls, no theettu. But if they live/stay and mix with their parents – whatever theettu the parents have, she will also have the same thing.
Q. What are the ASoucham rules if father-in-law’s older brother’s wife dies? Need clarification on what needs to be followed for the 10 days and 1 year?
Yes – 10 days theettu (ASoucham) will be there for married persons. For brahmachAris no theettu. For those who have theettu, during these 10 days,
* thirumaN can be worn but not SrIchUrNam.
* sandhyAvandhanam can be done quietly by men who have had yagyOpavItham.
* thiruvArAdhanam should not be done. perumAL should be placed somewhere thiruvArAdhanam can be done.
* No kOlam (rangoli) and no lighting of lamps
* santhai should not be learnt. pAsurams should not be recited.
* grantha kAlakshEpams should not be heard.
* nAma sankIrthanam can be done quietly and discussions on bhagavath vishayam can be done.
* General upanyAsams can be heard.
* Can go to dhivya dhEsams.
Q. If we come to know of our relatives passing away only the day after their passing, should we count the day of passing away as the first day of theettu or when we come to know about it?
Yes – days count remain the same irrespective of when we come to know. i.e., if we come to know on the 2nd day, we need to observe theettu till 3rd day only, not 3 days from the day we come to know.
Q. If paternal grandfather’s brother passes away, we understand it is 10 days theetu. Is there also a one-year block from celebrating any festivals such as SrI jayanthi or dhIpAvaLi?
For any death leading to 10 days theettu in our family, we should not be celebrating any festivals for our sake, in the first year. But we can fulfil our commitment to Perumal’s uthsavams and AzhwArs/AchAryas uthsavams, by doing whatever is compulsory such as special thiruvArAdhanam than usual, bhOgams, pAsurams/sthOthrams recital.
We get clothes for ourselves, some burst crackers for Deepavali etc – those are to be avoided.
Q. If grandfather’s younger brother’s passes away, will there be 10 day theettu?
Yes – it will be 10 days.
Q. What are the rules for vriddhi thIttu? 1. Can We draw rangoli outside? 2. Can we celebrate festivals? 3. Can we join wedding functions?
1 – Yes. 2 – No. 3 – No. we should not mix with others who don’t have theettu
Q. And can we perform vishNu sahasranAmam pArAyaNam during ASoucham?
pArAyanam shouldn’t be done. We can say it in our mind. We shouldn’t say out loud. granthams shouldn’t be touched.
Q. Can we read bhagavath gIthA during death ASoucham?
No.
Q. Is it true that pregnant women should not to put thirumaN or go towards mandir from 7th month? if these are true then what women should put instead of thirumaN during delivery and those 11/21 days after delivery?
thirunAmam can be applied. Going to temple is not prohibited in SAsthram, but depends on local traditions, we can try to follow as best as possible. After delivery, just Kumkum can be applied as vertical thilak (not full), since there will be ASoucham.
Q. Can we do puNdra dharana during sUthakam?
thirumaN should always be there – even during sUthakam/ASoucham. But during such time of impurity due to birth/death in family, we should not be wearing SrIchUrNam. There are some who say that during birth related impurity, we can wear SrIchUrNam. One can follow as per elders’ advice. In case of women, same – instead of SrIchUrNam, they should also wear something else (non-traditional).
Q. Is it correct that foods should not be consumed if there’s an eclipse or any kind of ASoucham in the house?
Yes – during the stipulated period before the eclipse – we should not consume food. During ASoucham, we can eat such prasAdham. Of course, when the prEtham is still not cremated, we will not have anything. But after that, we can consume during the ASoucham period also. But we should not carry forward any prepared food items after the eclipse is over or ASoucham is over – they should be discarded.
Q. During ASoucham, after how many days can karthA go to temple?
After 13th day, Subha svIkAram is done, karthA can go to temple.
Q. What are the dos and don’ts for women during menstrual periods?
Don’ts
- no kAlakshEpams, loud recitals of pAsurams/slokams etc.
- no touching of granthams in any form.
- no mixing with others or being in close proximity, even close relatives/family – should be in a separate room in isolation.
Do’s
- Reciting pAsurams/SlOkams in mind, without seeing the book is fine.
- Can rest more during this time and focus on dhyAnam of guruparamparA manthram and dhvyam.
- Also, light upanyasams on guru paramparai, general topics can be heard.
- nAma sankIrthanam can be done (alone, not in group)
- Can be with other women who are also in their menstrual cycle and discuss topics about bhagavan/AzhwArs/AchAryas
Q. Though the vEdham is eternal, it is unclear as to how the vEdhic injunctions can be uniformly applied across yugas, when so much has changed from kritha yuga to kali yuga? Also, in olden times, maybe ASoucham was valid as people were living in a joint family system, possibility of infection to other members in the family was always there and hence they kept themselves secluded & refrained from social interaction with the larger community. Nowadays we don’t have joint family system, generally speaking. Should not the concept of ASoucham be revisited?
The problem with revisiting is – who has the ability/capacity to analyse these aspects and declaring that these are void now?
It is not just based on joint family system – but is based on genetic connections. It does not hurt to follow SAsthram as best as possible for each individual rather than trying to change everything. On the other hand, the question arises – why should we change everything because we think in a particular way? Our ways and thought processes keep changing – today we may not like something but tomorrow we like it. today we may think something is logical – but tomorrow we may think the same thing is illogical.
For example, when we were teenagers, we would live recklessly, without much discipline, expecting our parents to do all our tasks – we thought we were doing the right thing and it was parents’ responsibility to care for us. But when we become parents, we see our children doing the same and we cannot accept their behaviour.
So, instead of trying to change things – let us see how we can adapt to old ways.
Q. What are the rules for vriddhi theettu in regards to : 1. Can We draw rangoli outside? 2. Can we celebrate festivals? 3. Can we join wedding functions?
1 – yes. 2 – yes. 3 – No. we should not mix with others who don’t have theettu.
Q. If our co-sister’s mother passes away, do we have sutak?
There won’t be any sutak.